Wants and Desires

They are not questions we like thrown back at us: “What do you want?  Or “what do you want now?” As adults,  when we are spoken to like that, we get annoyed and begin to speak to ourselves phrases like: “It is not often that I ask for something.” Or, “when I am asked, at least I try to be as obliging as I can.”

How nice a change it is when someone says: “Can I help you?” or “what can I do for you?”  How nice it is to be invited to make our needs known.

I suppose Christmas is like that. When children are asked by others: “What do you want from Santa” they have no trouble in telling all their requests and feel sure that what they want will be provided.

I remember being in protest marches on the streets of Dublin, London and New York (All good causes!) and listening to the chants going up and growing in volume: “What do we want?” Then the answers were  given:  “A place to live” or “An end to Star Wars”  or “Cancel all debt.” The next question was: “When do we want it?” The answer: “We want it now”.

So, wants are usually immediate, visible, attainable, and, urgent

Desires are different. They are hidden deep within us. People have said that wants are what we grasp; desires are what we reach for.

There are many things we might want but there are desires that we need always to care for – deep desires.

On this Gaudete (joyful) Sunday, the day of anticipatory joy of what is to come,  let me share with you a beautiful ancient Advent prayer from St. Anselm: (From Prayer of the Church, Friday, Advent Week 1)

“Let me seek you in desiring you;

Let me desire you in seeking you;

Let me find you in loving you;

Let me love you in finding you.”

Jesus puts the “want” question in a most gentle and totally different way when he asks you and me: “What is it you want?”  He is primarily interested in our deepest desires.  This Advent time,  certainly attend to all your wants but do not overlook your deepest desires.

Fr. Michael McCullagh, C.M.

17th December 2006